Gluten-Free Chocolate Chip Zucchini Brownies Recipe

Zucchini adds moisture to these fudgy gluten-free brownies.

In the thick of joy and the slow drain of heartache, I bake. I've mentioned this before. Baking is my way. I tie on my apron and rustle up my inner domestic goddess and cope with the world. Because joy tastes sweeter shared with those you love, gathered around a clatter of plates and clinking glasses and spoons licked clean. And heartache...

Well, heartache may not be soothed or tamed by a cookie or slice of cake.

But it doesn't hurt to try.

As for me, I've been reading several (new to me) books this summer. And I suppose, if you were to analyze the connecting themes, you might discern a search not only for meaning in a sticky, complicated post 9/11 world, but also for release. Release from the grip of societal expectations, collective assumptions, and the yoke of consumerism (I am, after all, post estrogen dependence; priorities do not include miracle-push-up bras, nail polish decals, waxed nether regions or upper lip injections).

I am more interested in keeping my mind agile than my thighs firm.

Hence the books I'm reading. Newest (to me) is Buddha's Brain. I'm learning about the amazing plasticity of the mind, and the neuro-scientific practice of creating new "wiring" (especially as we age) by gently training our mind to release ancient, habitual (so often, negative and critical) thought patterns (what the PhDs call neural pathways but what I like to refer to as my teeth-grinding mental squirrel in a cage wearing my grandmother's wig) and cultivate more self compassion. Which in turn makes everyone happier, apparently.

I guess if you're feeling at peace with the energy ebb and sometimes tumultuous flow of your days and nights, and baking brownies with those surplus zucchinis, and watching the magical late afternoon sunlight dappling the backs of a pair of wild turkeys guiding their brood of nine into the blackberries below the kitchen window, you can feel pretty blissed out.

Or maybe it's the chocolate talking.


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Gluten-Free Cherry Almond Crisp

Fresh organic cherries. Mother Nature's ruby gems.

Cherry Baby

Summer is heating up. And so is yours truly in all her hot flashing glory. (We'll get to the cherry almond crisp recipe in a moment- but first I have to get something off my chest.)

Last night my husband was scanning channels on cable. I sat down next to him, (quickie dinner plate perched on my knee) and crunched romaine lettuce, almonds and dried cherries as he watched the end of the Shawshank Redemption. One of his favorite movies. An affection shared by many a cinephile. This is a beloved film.

Then I heard it.

A line that stung and burned so deep and hot I stopped chewing. I stopped breathing. I sat as still as the fork on my uneaten plate of salad.

The despicable, murdering bully of a prison guard is being led away by police. We hear the voice of God Morgan Freeman purr with quiet authority that rumor has it this cruel and abusive man was led away "crying like a little girl".

The ultimate put down. Not only did he cry. He cried like a girl.

Because, really, who would ever want to be caught crying like a girl? It's the ultimate in weakness. The worst thing you could say about a man. It's dependent. It's needy. It's unmanly. Inadequate. Irrational. Disgusting.

Worthy of contempt.

A flood of sneers and mocking imagery ran through my head. All the put-downs of childhood endured and encoded in the hippocampus, stashed away for safe keeping.

You throw like a girl. You run like a girl. You cry like a girl.

Bullies. Belittling. Because girls are less worthy. Less capable. Less whole.

It's a message our culture delivers every day, via media of all kinds. From raunchy punchlines about yeast infections to commercials for thigh cream, from political pundits calling single women sluts, to the latest (oops!) leaked sex tape, from a misogynist song lyric that rhymes with witch to the impossibly high platform heels women teeter in, hobbled for fashion's sake, shoes designed for prey.

I think about this and our nation's Cult of Youth as I walk and sigh at twilight, wearing Converse sneakers and photographing violet shadows with my iPhone.

How often are girls and women celebrated for something other than appearance- a pretty object to penetrate, to own, or rate on a scale of one to ten.

And after a certain age- it only gets worse.

Just look at Botox sales stats. Women fear aging with a depth of disgust unfathomable. We are buoyed on an ocean of revulsion toward aging. Why else would we fail- collectively- to tell the honest truth about plastic surgery and the freakish waxy desperation it exudes? There isn't an actress over the age of 30 who can express worry or surprise with her forehead muscles any more (well that's an exaggeration. There are, maybe... three?).

Ask yourself- how often do we get to see ourselves depicted honestly, as complicated, brave, strong, authentically sexual- never mind brilliant, sassy, dimensional - and not be reduced to mere object or caricature?

Or worse, invisible.

This keeps me up at night. This girl stuff. This aging stuff. This what-do-I-do-next stuff. My hip starts to ache and I lie in the dark and feel no closer to solving my dilemma than I did yesterday. Or the day before.

And tonight?

I am sorry to say, I am no closer to an answer.

But at least I've told something true.



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Olive Tapenade Recipe

Vegan olive spread on a slice of gluten-free French bread.

Summer is officially here. The longest day of the year has paused on her axis for one delightful exhale. The big fat Strawberry Moon will be illuminating the sky tonight. Mother Nature's biggest full moon show of 2013. It is a perfect moment to stop. And put down your various electronic devices (seductive and addictive and shiny as they are).

Turn your gaze skyward. To something bigger than yourself. To something mythic and eternal. Timeless and rooted in dreams.

Celebrate the kind happiness of a warm summer night.

And whip up this simple tapenade.

Perfect for topping slices of a fresh baked baguette (my easy gluten-free baguette recipe using Pamela's wheat-free bread mix is here).

This salty, tangy olive spread is also a lovely no-cook pasta sauce.



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My Favorite Gluten-Free Diet Summer Recipes

Cook Up a Gluten-Free Summer

Make your gluten-free diet fresh, fast, and light. These hand-picked Gluten-Free Goddess® recipes celebrate the abundance of local ingredients and garden-glorious taste. 

Kick up your warm weather meals with local fresh herbs, tender greens, lime infused guacamole,  protein rich hummus, and bright basil pesto. Simple grilled fish, colorful stir-fries, and brilliant quinoa salads  make for light and easy meals, perfect for picnic style get-togethers. 

Strawberries, blueberries and peaches inspire easy crisps and cobblers, cakes, muffins, and dairy-free ice creams everyone will enjoy.

Eating gluten-free couldn't be simpler. 

Or more fabulous.

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Vegan Strawberry Chocolate Chip Sherbet

Ripe strawberries make delicious non-dairy sherbet

Now is the perfect time for a sherbet recipe. Why? Because June is lush and abundant in strawberries. And how do I love these sweet ruby gems? Any way I can get 'em. Popped into my mouth straight from the colander. Rolled in brown sugar and nibbled. Baked into scones (have you tried my Strawberry Chocolate Chip Scones recipe?) and Strawberry Chocolate Chip Muffins. Nestled into Strawberry Rhubarb Crisp.

And this week- transformed into a bliss inducing non-dairy frozen confection.

Sherbet- berry pink and creamy and just sweet enough. Studded with vegan dark chocolate chips (darling you know I love strawberries and chocolate together, and I commingle the two every chance I get).

So I hope you dig it.

And dig in.

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Gluten-Free Strawberry Rhubarb Muffins with Cinnamon Streusel Topping

Strawberry rhubarb muffins with streusel- gluten-free and vegan.

Can't get enough of the classic spring pairing of strawberries and rhubarb? Me neither. So I baked a batch of muffins, dressed up to party with cinnamon streusel topping. These easy to toss together treats are tender pull-apart bites of grainy buckwheat sweetness studded with bits of tart rhubarb. A recipe perfect for brunch or afternoon tea.

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Gluten-Free Blueberry Crumble-Crisp Recipe

Kick-off your gluten-free summer with a blueberry crumble-crisp.

Blueberry Love

Summer is not officially here until the eve of June 20th- the longest day of the calendar year. But why wait to share one of my quintessential Midsummer recipes? The kindest season is far too brief. As the Bard of Avon once penned, summer's lease hath all too short a date. So who am I to hold back and play hard-to-get, to deny you even one day of partaking in this (rather modest) indulgence?

I believe in the here and now more than the promise of ever-after.

Not that ever-after does not hold its enduring charms. The swath we name eternity is threaded through and through with everyday blinks as brief as a silk worm's life. Which, as it turns out, is perilously close to a single, fleeting summer.

In my view, if I am honest with myself and paying attention, eternity can be found inside a June. Within a child's hand clasp. Echoed in a tea cup. All that I long for, wish for, dream of, has already happened, this I know. In some far off starlit part of me that remains forever untouchable and true, eternity is happening now, and breathes within the tiny beating bud of even my fears, and pain. It knows no boundaries, or Gregorian demarcation. It is patient. And full of music.

I see it flicker in my sons' eyes.

This gift of time.

And the moment I spot it, it is already gone, light years away, clean and immaculate.


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